曾经失望 绝望 不再盼望

想抛开过去追求欢乐 不安 放弃

哪怕被说残忍 还是狠心 转身就走

嘴硬 装傻

午夜里心酸泪流

我没想过 我会难过

明知玩不起 很不理智

心痛 真真切切

狠狠逼退 面目全非

The ending of two o eleven

Greetings at 4 in the morning,

MERRY XMAS readers, if there's any still around...

Time flies, really fast..it's like the last Xmas was just yesterday, i could still remember how much fun I had with the bunch last year. Just a blink of eye, it's now getting to an end of another year..it's like, wow

It was a tough yet great year I had, i must say. Experienced new challenges and obstacles, met new faces that have drawn my year 2011 a wonderful year. Feeling glad. There were times that I was totally overwhelmed by problems and I got myself cried into sleep but still I've gone through those shits, because I have them with me - friends and family, being so caring, lovable and thoughtful. Feeling thankful.

And one thing that I know is every each person walks in your life for a purpose, either it's good or bad, Long or just a short period, even if it's hurtful, at the end it will still lead to something better. Thank god letting these particular person comes into my life, for staying around me, even though if he/she is placed far away from me, but I could still feel the cares and loves. I know nothing can be lasted, I do not want to know when it gonna be an end, but for this moment, they are people whom I treasured.

But whoever that I've hurt unintentionally, I pray for them, to have a happy and better life, they deserve anything better.

Looking back a year ago today, am feeling grateful for how far I've come.

Pray hard for a even better year ahead! Cheers people!



Xx loves

when its time to leave a person or place behind, go in peace, knowing that if you're meant to return someday..you will.

somehow, if its not?

just keep walking, and don't look back.

Times go by, and the due date is over. I decided not to go back college, like finally I've made up my mind. It was quite a tough month for me as I was struggling in the same matter for like over and over again..cause it's not like my own thing, when you got the responsibility in hand, you can't just think for yourself. Anyhow, reality always comes first. So yea, gonna stay and work even harder for my future now.

Yet, I went for trips. Firstly, it was Singapore.

Tried to conquer my fear of heights by putting a try to have a ride on the roller coaster..for TWICE! Two different roller coasters. and then Marina Bay, beautiful scenery, but I was totally GGed up there. How sad -.-

Then, it was Langkawi. Went there with my bunch of sisters and brothers. Had a great time with them although the weather was really a bitch. Rained for 3days straight and sun shines on the day we leave. Somehow, we got to have some fun time together still :)

Followed by Hat Yai!


Got a great escape from the hectic life for a moment, and I had a rehab from it. Though when I got back, Ive still needa face all the shits somehow at least I got a relief already. Feels better.

As life goes on, I learn to appreciate those who find a way to stick around more than those who walk away, as I know my destiny doesn't tied to people who walks away from me. And I surely know even true hearts stay apart, but it will never change how my feelings to them.

xo

lemonade

It was a very hectic week for me. The due date is getting nearer, and yet I still haven't made up my mind yet. It's torturing, handling working stress at the same time I have to make a decision for my life, my future.

Been having a few sleepless night. My god, that's killing me. There was one night, I couldn't really sleep..too much thoughts running through my mind and then I thought of the a quote,

WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMON, LEARN TO MAKE IT LEMONADE

Some people might think people like me, thinking too much, its a little over reacting. But all I can say is, different people got different perception and when you're in that situation, and the thing is really important to you, there you go, you will feel how painful it is.

Sometimes, you've got to walk though the pain to know your own strength. and without the pain, we would forever remain the same. So, do not hide from the heartbreak. That's what gone through my mind that night. It can be applied on anything.

I'm gonna hang on, head up and move on.

Okay, thats it. Till then.

FEAR

She seems so cool all the time.

Her pride shines all the way.

She's sassy, and she rules.

Her aura seems can never be defeated.

But,

sometimes don't be fooled by the big ego,

cause most of the time it covered up by the bigger insecurity.

The fear in her, its a bit overwhelming.

Afraid of making wrong decision that might caused the feeling of regret

...again.

So hard to choose the path

and

she fears.

I believed, for everything you have missed, you have gained something better.

xx

may

It was quite a hectic month for me. My daily routine is to work, eat and sleep. Repeating the same routine during weekdays, and party hard on saturday night, then rest whole day on the sunday. They were what I did in may. Sounds boring but its not easy at all. The new job is very challenging,feeling kinda stressed out at times and I still got the bad habit of staying up late at night. So sometimes its really hard to concentrate at work but still, I'm working hard on it. Very tiring yet satisfied. My efforts are not wasted, I got compensated very well upon my hard work :)

Been through a hard times in between as well. Doubted about the people around, and myself..bothered me a lot. Started to feel insecure just right after I'm feeling safe. Idk, I don't feel comfortable to be around anymore.

Goodnight May.

Hi June. Let's pray for it to be a better one.

Xoxo